my reading for the week:
“God’s Glory Alone” – pretty cool book to start the year with – with the Protestant Reformation turning 500 soon, the company had different authors contribute books on distinctions of the Reformation – this book was from the phrase “solo gloria” – or whatever the Latin phrase is for God’s glory alone – the book wrote about our current obsession in society with ourselves, helped in large part with social media – and offered the critique – and solutions – for how to address such a problem – again, enjoyable
“On Pluto” – man developed early-onset Alzheimer’s and has chronicled his fight with it via a documentary and with the book I read – I’d read exerts from Runner’s World – after having seen my grandparents deal with the disease, the book was a good read – sort of a book about the struggle we all have to keep hope even in the darkest times
j
And now it’s time for…
Gifted, in space
by Mayfield
Battleship Mayfieldya landed at Planet Bri, a forsaken planet at the far reaches of the universe. They were there on a mission to save the White Bear.
Well, to save the White Bear from Trucker Kinzie…
It all started when the Battleship got a signal.
“Help me, whatever your name is. You’re my only hope.”
Captain Patrick immediately recognized the signal from Princess Bri. He directed the ship towards her planet while Special Helper broke things, First Mate Abbey continued her quest of usurpation, Lieutenant Delaina kept watch for cute boys, she was always disappointed, and Admiral Jade insulted the Captain with her politeness.
“Remember, the White Bear can be very dangerous,” Captain Patrick said to the crew, “but he’s special too – even though he’s not so special that he’s a human – but he’s more special than the Trucker which is why we have to side with the bear in this case.”
“I agree,” Lieutenant Delaina said, “If I can’t have white fur boots, then no one gets white, fur boots.”
Every year, Planet Bri sacrificed a first-born daughter to the White Bear. It was the price they paid for their people to be safe, free, and keepers of just the darn-cutest cats this side of Pluto.
The “daughter to be sacrificed” this year hired the Trucker to take out the bear. Kinzie agreed, mostly because she enjoyed the “crunch” sound a good bear makes under the tires.
The crew found the Trucker’s evil lair, it’s always a “gas and go” at the first exit at a planet. Captain Patrick ordered the crew to stay on the ship for its safety – and for Special Helper to stand guard – so that he would be the first to go if there was a sudden attack.
“Your gig is up, Evil Trucker,” Captain Patrick said.
“Let me ask you Captain,” Trucker Kinzie said, “What exactly would you do for a white bear? Would you sacrifice the lives of innocents so that he stays fat and happy?”
“Give it up Trucker,” Captain Patrick said, “Your logic will never be as good as mine. Plus, the White Bear has plenty of stress keeping the planet safe. If he eats a little girl every now and again, I mean, I don’t go that way, but he pays good money for the girl so it doesn’t seem like the greatest evil.”
Trucker Kinzie threw her soda cup at the Captain. SPLAT! The Captain wasn’t the smoothest of movers, so the cup caught him square in the face. All at once, Captain Patrick was soaked from head to toe in 44 ounces of orangey juice.
For days, Captain’s skin was an orange hue, but he had saved the White Bear from Kinzie’s tire tread. Of course, he wasn’t able to save the girl, but pretty much the whole planet was in agreement that the girl had to go if the bear was paying good money – so those that lived, lived happily ever after…